My Broken Sunshine
by 2kindsofcrazy
Summary: What have I become? A figment of a child's vivid imagination or their most terrifiying nightmare? Beauty and skill beyond compare and immortality...imagination yes. Suffer from constant thirst and eternal damnation...nightmare yes. This is what I w
1. Almost Lover

**P/N: hello ya'll! This is my first Twilight story! I normally write sasuhina fics for Naruto, which are fairly popular. If you get a chance check them out but here I have a new story! My Broken Sunshine. Now I'm getting my lovely friend Tessa to post this for me so show her some love and read! I may not update a lot though because of my addiction to Breaking Dawn.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. If I did it would be nowhere near as good as it is now. I also don't own Bullet with Butterfly wings which belongs to the Smashing Pumpkins and I don't own Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy either!**

Chapter 1: Almost Lover

What have I become? A figment of a child's vivid imagination or their most terrifiying nightmare? Beauty and skill beyond compare and immortality...imagination yes. Suffer from constant thirst and eternal damnation...nightmare yes. This is what I wanted, what I desired most. I have become what I wanted. A monster. Yes.

--

"Isabella your on in five minutes!" a stage director called but I just blankly stared at myself in the mirror.My long mahogany hair was in loose curls down my back and my piercing rich topaz eyes were rimmed heavily with black eye liner and masscara. I was wearing a black spagetti strap shirt with a mesh overlay that came over my long pale hands. My pants were black skinny jeans with many chains hanging off of the loops and I had on a pair of black and white DCs.

"Come on Bella! We need you." Came the smooth and buttery voice of my bass player Donavin.His blood red eyes stared into my topaz ones. Donavin had perfectly messy black hair and a squared and chisled nose and jaw, but his pale skin and eyes marked him for who he was. A monster. I had met Donavin when I came into the music industry, he was a great friend and he really knew his stuff. He was very intelligent and was fun to be around but he drank human blood. That was his only turn off.My band mates made fun of me for not drinking human blood, for opting to lower myself to drink from animals. I don't let it get to me though, sometimes I wonder why I don't drink human blood when the rest of them do but every time I try I just can't. Maybe its because of my "family" from the past but I won't drink human blood. Donavin held out his pale hand to me and I gingerly took it.

I could hear the rush and noise of the audience as he led me behind the curtain to the stage.Annabelle and May were walking graceful towards us with smiles on their identical faces. Both had long auburn hair that came past their waist and blood red eyes. They were clad in baggy jeans with holes at the knee, black turtle necks with no sleeves, clunky combat boots, and loads of black bracelts. I always thought it would be nice to have a sister, a twin sister at that. The twins were lovely girls but they like to play tricks on everyone. You never wanted to be one their bad side.Annabelle went over to the drums behind us and May picked up the black electric guitar on my left while Donavin put on the black bass guitar that was to my right. I sighed and took my place at the microphone. The curtains went up and the crowd of unsuspecting humans went wild. Cheers of I love you and you rock filled the air and I loosened up a bit.

"Hello ya'll! How are you tonight? Of course your fine because your here to see us so you've gotta be rockin! Don't get too high now and lets rock!" May said into the mic in a twinkling voice only she could achive.I wasn't good at speaking with the audience, I could only sing and I was comfortable with that.

"Our first song is called Bullet With Butterfly Wings! Enjoy!" May said I took a deep breath and began to sing.

_The world is a vampire,  
sent to drain  
Secret destroyers,hold you up to the flames  
And what do I get, for my pain?  
Betrayed desires,and a piece of the game_

I loved singing to people. It calmned by nerves and made me happy. My voice always mesmorised our audience. It was my power. Some of the people who knew this song sang along with me while others just cheered. This song was inspired by my life before I became a vampire and my life now combined

_Even though I know  
I suppose I'll show  
All my cool and cold  
like old job  
Despite all my rage  
I am still just a rat in a cage  
Despite all my rage  
I am still just a rat in a cage  
Then someone will say  
what is lost can never be saved  
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage  
Now I'm naked,  
nothing but an animal  
But can you fake it,  
for just one more show?  
And what do you want?  
I want to change  
And what have you got,  
when you feel the same?  
Even though I know -  
I suppose I'll show  
All my cool and cold - like old job  
Despite all my rage  
I am still just a rat in a cage  
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage  
Then someone will say what is lost can never be saved  
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage  
Tell me I'm the only one  
Tell me there's no other one  
Jesus was the only son, yeah.  
Tell me I'm the chosen one  
Jesus was the only son for you_

As I sang I got the strange sensation that someone important was watching me I glanced at vampire speed to Donavin and at the break of the song his twitched his nose. That was our signal that other vampires were in the audience or somewhere near by. I tried to scan the audience but even with my vampire vision everyone still looked so tiny.

_Despite all my rage  
I am still just a rat in a cage  
Despite all my rage  
I am still just a rat in a cage  
And someone will say what is lost can never be saved  
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage  
Despite all my rage am I still just a rat in a-  
Despite all my rage am I still just a rat in a-  
Despite all my rage am I still just a rat in a cage_

When I screamed the last line the crowd went wild. I knew their blood was boiling from my voice.

_Tell me I'm the only one  
Tell me there's no other one  
Jesus was the only son for you  
And I still believe that I cannot be saved  
And I still believe that I cannot be saved  
And I still believe that I cannot be saved  
And I still believe that I cannot be saved!_

As I sang the last part most of the crowd had joined in. Sure the last few lines were a little atheist but I wasn't going to hell anytime soon. May twitched her nose at me as Donavin strung the last cord. There were vampires. And they were close. We were going to have to cut the concert short and send the other band out early. Oh well if we send out fruit baskets they will be fine. I cleared my throat to announce the next song. When vampires are around my band mates can't speak or else they will lunge off the stage and reveal our identities to the world.

"Well you guys here is our next song. Its a song really special to me and I would like you to hear it." I said softly and the crowd cheered as I walked gracefully over to a keyboard that was in the center of the stage.I sat down at the stool and positioned the mic quickly and then like magic my hands flew across the keys. This song was for Edward. My Edward. The Edward from my memories who loved me, or at least said he did but then left me. I took a deep breath and the sang along with the music I was playing.

_Your fingertips across my skin  
The pine trees swaying in the wind  
Images  
You sang me Spanish lullabies  
The sweetest sadness in your eyes  
Clever trick_

My home in Forks, Washington was coming back to me. The forset greenerary and the constant smell of rain and wet soil. The permant clouds and occasional sun that would penetrate through.

_Well, I never want to see you unhappy  
I thought you'd want the same for me  
Goodbye, my almost lover  
Goodbye, my hopeless dream  
I'm trying not to think about you  
Can't you just let me be?  
So long, my luckless romance  
My back is turned on you  
Should've known you'd bring me heartache  
Almost lovers always do_

Edward. When he left I never got to say goodbye. That was part of the reason I joined this band. I was hoping that one day he would hear my song and come back to me. If he has I don't know but now I'm trying to give up on him. But its so hard! Jacob was right about one thing. Edward never loved me. But I can still hear his song for me ringing in my ears.

_We walked along a crowded street  
You took my hand and danced with me  
Images  
And when you left, you kissed my lips  
You told me you would never, never forget  
These images  
No,_

I remember the day he left me in the forset all alone. That was the day I died. Emotionally that is. I didn't really die until a few weeks later. I would never had expected Edward to leave me like that, I thought he cared for me but apparently I was wrong.

_Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy  
I thought you'd want the same for me  
Goodbye, my almost lover  
Goodbye, my hopeless dream  
I'm trying not to think about you  
Can't you just let me be?  
So long, my luckless romance  
My back is turned on you  
Should've known you'd bring me heartache  
Almost lovers always do  
I cannot go to the ocean  
I cannot drive the streets at night  
I cannot wake up in the morning  
Without you on my mind  
So you're gone and I'm haunted  
And I bet you are just fine  
Did I make it that  
Easy to walk right in and out  
Of my life?  
Goodbye, my almost lover  
Goodbye, my hopeless dream  
I'm trying not to think about you  
Can't you just let me be?  
So long, my luckless romance  
My back is turned on you  
Should have known you'd bring me heartache  
Almost lovers always do_

I finished the song and at vampire speed Donavin gave the signal. A brush though his hair was all it took to set me off. I stood up and grabbed the mic with trembling hands.

"This next song is-" I stopped and collapsed to the floor of the stage.

"Oh my GOD! Bella!"Annabelle and May said at the same time and rushed from their places to my side and Donavin took me into his arms and our band rushed off stage and into our dressing room.May locked the door and Annabelle took a magazine and plopped herself on the couch.

"Well I actually wanted to play tonight." May said flipping through her book of trash.

"Whatever. Nice job Bella. I wonder who the vampires were..." Donavin said trailing off.

"Doesn't matter anymore Donny. They aren't our problem." Annabelle said looking through the mini fridge.Being vampire rock stars we can't get out to hunt very often, especially me. So Donavin came up with an ingenious idea. If one of us got the chance to go hunting we would bring bottles of blood back with us to take on the go. Of course I was the only one who hunted for animals, but that was besides the point. Well actually I have no point, I never do. A knock on the door interupted my thoughts and The twins gave each other looks.

"Um go away!" May said."We don't want fruit baskets!" Annabelle laughed.

"No we throw them out anyway so don't waste you time." May said.

"So leave Bella is in excrutiating pain!" Annabelle winked at me and I cued the bad theatrics.

"Owww! Oh god! I gonna die! I see a light but its not white! Its red and there are flames coming from it!" I let out high pitched scream that cracked the mirror. "Its hell! I'm going to hell!"

"Bout time too." Donavin chuckled and brought me to sit in his lap.

"Shut up! Don't go towards the light Bella!" May said."But if you do, by all means bring me back a t-shirt! Size small!" Annabelle giggled.

"I'm dieing! I'm dieing! I'm dead!" I said and we all paused for a second but then the door opened to reveal people I didn't think I would ever see.Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rosealie, Jasper, and Alice all stood at the door.

--

**P/N: okay ya'll! You've read now please review!**

_(T/N: 里Tessa! 再次，我没有编辑本章。 我为您也许遇到了的所有差错道歉。 希望您享用了Paige' s故事。 获得乐趣读休息… -哈欠玛雅人蜂! 雅人蜂! 我ya，匈奴!)(-haha. i no speakeh deh englais_!_)  
_

_TRANSLATION:_

_(T/N: Tessa here! Once again, I didnt edit this chapter. I apologize for any mistakes you may have encountered. Hope you enjoyed Paige's story. Have fun reading the rest... -yawn- Maya Bee! Maya Bee! I love ya, hun!)_


	2. Don't You Dare

**P/N: this chappies a little short but stick with me. It will get longer I pinky promise!**

**Disclaimer: if you believe for a second that I have an ounce of talent that can be mistaken for Stephenie Meyer you need to go to the white cushie room with cool pajamas and no dor knobs**.

Chapter 2:Don't You Dare

I gasped and Donavin wrapped his long and pale arms protectively around my waist. Annabelle took a swing of blood before speaking to the people in the doorway.

"What do you vampires want? Get out! Get out NOW!" Annabelle said fircely, I had to stop her before she set the building on fire.

"Wait Anna! I know them!" I said getting up from Donavin.Annabelle didn't look at me but I knew her eyes were black. She crouched down into a fighting position and was about to lunged. May tackled her to the wall, a few spark of fire flew between them as she did.

"Donavin keep her pinned. May open her mouth." I said and they did exactly what I said.I took a full bottle of human blood from the fridge and brought it over to Annabelle. As I poured the blood down her throat she calmed down considerably. When she was completely calm Donavin laid her on the sofa and I turned to our unexpected "guests".

"Well like Annabelle said what do you want?" I asked them.Alice was the first of them to step through the doorway. She came up to me and wrapped her arms around me gingerly at first but the she realised she couldn't her me and she squeezed. Hard.

"Oh Bella we've missed you so much! You don't know how much! Oh!" Alice said squeezing me and I couldn't help but let a small smile out.Alice and the others had done me no wrong, no ill will. But they still left me. Left me broken. But they didn't know that I would die. Alice let me go and looked up at me.

"Why? Why can't I see your future?" Alice asked.

"Because I don't have one." I said solemnly.

"Wha-? But everyone has a future!" Alice said confused and I shrugged.

"I did have a future, but it involved-" I sighed, I couldn't say his name. It hurt too much.

"Its my own fault though. I destroyed my future. And you probably can't see me because I live day by day and I don't think about tomorow or what I going to do."Alice nodded slowly not fully grasping what was going on. I turned to the rest of them and gave a small sad smile.

"Hello." I said meekly as I gave them a small wave and Emmett scooped me up into a bear hug.He squeezed me tighter than Alice and I was happy to have my bear of a brother back, even if it was only for a short time. Esme hugged me gently and kissed my temple like she was my own mother. And in a way she is. Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed it a bit in comforting way. Jasper hugged me still afraid that I would break but Rosealie just stood in the door frame.

"Rose-" I started but she stopped me.

"Its my fault you died isn't it?" Rose said weakly."Its my fault. If I hadn't been so hostile towards you Edward would still be here with you and you would be with us!"

"No Rose. No. Its not your fault. Its mine." I said and wrapped my arms around Roselie.

"Wha-how?" Rose asked and I knew by the confused looks boring into my back that everyone else wanted to know as well.

"E-," I stopped, still couldn't say his name. "He said that he didn't love anymore. He said he lost all intrest in me. I was only a human after all. It was strange though. He told me he loved so many times but then to break it off like that. I felt terrible. I know I must've done something wrong, something to upset him. But I've given up trying to figure out what I did but don't worry Rose I don't think anything that happened was your fault." I said and Rose nodded.

"Alright I'm loving the love fest reunion and all but seriously we need to get out of here. Bella just "collapsed on stage. She should be gone by now." Annabelle said as May she snapped her fingers and fire appered on the tips.

"Hey do you guys have a place we can crash?" May asked and Alice nodded.

"Yes we do! Come one!" Alice said clapping her hands together and the walked out of the crowded dressing room.As the others walked out Donavin picked me up and May threw a blanket over me.

"Come on sicky." Donavin chuckled and I gave him a weak smile.

--

The drive to the Cullens was a loud and enjoyable affair. Alice was constantly chattering with May and Annabelle. Apparently Annabelle had gotten over her hostility towards the Cullens. Emmett kept making crude and silly jokes that kept the whole van in stiches. They pulled up to a large apartment complex and I frowned.

"Alice how do you guys live here? Do you each have an apartment?" I asked perplexed with the situation and Alice shook her head.

"No silly! We bought a whole floor, bust out the walls, took out all of the kitchens except for one and then made walls where we wanted." Alice said excitedly.

"Busting out the walls was my favorite part." Emmett smirked and Roselie rolled her eyes but smiled at her husband's antics.

"Alright lets go in." I said and Alice squealed.We took an elevator up from a very ritzy lobby to the very top floor. Alice went to the first door she saw and pulled out a key. She threw open the door to reveal a very lavish aparment. The kind of place rockers like to trash.

"You guys are home!" came a very loud, yet melodiac voice.A tall vampire with long strawberry blonde hair came into their view. She had on denim shorts and a red cami and she looked beautiful. Who was she? Then I noticed that everyone had suddenly tensed except for my band mates, what was wrong? I looked at Alice and she was staring coldly at something. I followed her gaze to see someone I hadn't seen in years. Edward Anthony Masen Cullen.Donavin wrapped a pale arm protectively around my waist to keep me from falling down. Edward looked straight at me with wide shocked eyes.

"Isabella?" he asked, not really believing that it was me.He tried to come near me but I pushed a sofa in his way without touching it. The Cullens looked at me surprised but Donavin, Annabelle, May just glared at him.

"Bella? Is that really you?" Edward asked and I glared at him.

"Don't you dare call me Bella!" I shouted and then I quickly squirmed of of Donavin's grasp and bolted towards the door.I hurriedly pressed the buttons for the elevator and when on came I quickly shut the doors and closed them behind me. Then I weakly stopped the elevtaor between some random floors and curled into a ball.

--

**P/N: okay ya'll! Review or the snacky monster will steal your skittles!**


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